Hawaii’is Spam Problem – Black Market Spam

Spam alert. There’s a big black market product which is shaking Hawaiian daily life to its core. Spam. Canned meat. Here’s the lowdown – the people in the state of Hawaii eat more Spam than in all the other 49 states combined. It’s everywhere. There are more than six flavors of spam last time I … Continue reading “Hawaii’is Spam Problem – Black Market Spam”

Spam alert.

There’s a big black market product which is shaking Hawaiian daily life to its core. Spam. Canned meat.

Here’s the lowdown – the people in the state of Hawaii eat more Spam than in all the other 49 states combined. It’s everywhere. There are more than six flavors of spam last time I looked (Terriyaki, Spicy, Low Sodium, Smokey, Turkey, Spam with Cheese and Regular)

It used to be funny, it used to be cute. Now it’s a black market product fueling drug addiction and causing a panic among retailiers. Canned meat products are getting stolen from stores and sold on the street. Retailers are starting to put Spam in locked cases. I have a better idea. Just stop selling it.

Spam became a Hawaiian food during WWII when rations on pork forced the people living here to used what was available – potted meat. They used it because it was cheap, versatile, easy to use, and didn’t taste terrible. It was used in place of breakfast meats, in place of lunch meats, in place of dinner meats. And when the war and the rationing ended they kept using it. Mainly, because it was cheap and easy.

I don’t know if anyone has looked recently or not – but Spam is no longer cheap. It’s still easy but the truth is – it’s never really been tasty. Sorry hipsters and Spam lovers – it’s not a delicacy – it’s potted extra pig parts.

So, now, it’s expensive enough to be a black market product. Easy solution. Stop selling it. Move on to something different. Let it go.

The fabric of reality, half priced things, and the end of my fast.

What exactly is the fabric of reality? What holds us all together? I am speaking not just metaphorically but also literally. Think about it, you are made up of atoms that are made up of protons and electrons that are made up of smaller particles and all of them are held together by universal forces that we can put a name to but that no one actually understands. Something is keeping us from flying apart at any given moment. What is it that holds the fabric of reality together?

Personally, I think that atomic force, gravity, electricity, magnetism and the rest are simply the visible manifestations of God. We are held together (and not just us but EVERYTHING) by these forces and to me, it is pretty clear that this is the hand of God. Why can’t you look God in the face? Because to see the true nature of these forces, one is destroyed. It’s a solid concept in Zen, if you strive to master contemplation you will lose the ability to contemplate.

Here are a few things to consider:

1. You are not still. You only think you’re still. You are accelerating.

2. Electromagnetic forces are holding your skin and bones together. (Whew.)

3. Time flows as you read. But need it flow forward? Might it flow backward, so that you unread each word and the words appear to you in reverse order?

4. Only 5 percent of the universe that you inhabit can be described as familiar matter. According to the author’s formulation, 25 percent is dark matter. The remaining 70 percent may consist of dark energy, which remains at this moment a hypothetical concept. But the next generation of particle accelerators may be powerful enough to achieve empirical tests of this theory and many of the others postulated here. If at some future date physical evidence is found to corroborate the boldest of these speculations, trips to Stockholm may ensue.
from The Fabric of the Cosmos by Brian Greene

If you stop and think about it, really think about it, it’s totally terrifying…unless you have some basic truth to hold you grounded. You don’t have to go Trippin with the Dalai Lama to get it. You just have to recognize that here we are. All of us. Held together by something that holds us together and most likely, we aren’t going to rush apart any time soon. Unless we take the time to really really really get it.

On the personal side of things…buy some of the books I’ve written.

Finally, this is the last day of my cleansing fast. I can’t wait to eat some great bread, mozzarella cheese, and a big juicy mango.

Ramblin’ Man: All this talk of Cats has me thinking…Beer vs. Pussy

rambling man columnOkay…for some reason I am a little hesitant to post this entire in depth analysis sent by Kid McGurk on the front page here….a couple of examples will suffice and click below for the rest of this…..

Wearing a condom does not make a beer any less enjoyable.
Advantage: Beer.

Too much head makes you mad at the person giving you a
beer.
Advantage: Pussy.

Continue reading “Ramblin’ Man: All this talk of Cats has me thinking…Beer vs. Pussy”

Got Bilk?

Milk beer called ‘Bilk’ to go on sale in Hokkaido

NAKASHIBETSU, Hokkaido — A brewery here has succeeded in producing a low-malt beer with milk, after the drink was suggested as a product that would help use up surplus milk. The drink, called “Bilk” will go on sale on Feb. 1. It reportedly has a fruity flavor that its brewers hope will be popular among women. The idea for the drink was conceived after dairy firms threw out a huge amount of surplus milk in March last year. The son of the manager of a liquor store in Nakashibetsu, whose main industry is dairy farming, suggested the idea of producing the milk beer to local brewery Abashiri Beer. Continue reading “Got Bilk?”

There is no God, Moses was tripping on Drugs

Somehow I think this is going to be hard for a lot of Christians, Jews, and Muslims to accept. Maybe it will encourage them to take magic mushrooms though. I think that could be really cool…or totally disastrous for the entire planet. Stupid Moses (see story below about stupid Trent Reznor and story below that about stupid women.)

JERUSALEM (AFP) – High on Mount Sinai, Moses was on psychedelic drugs when he heard God deliver the Ten Commandments, an Israeli researcher claimed in a study published this week.

Such mind-altering substances formed an integral part of the religious rites of Israelites in biblical times, Benny Shanon, a professor of cognitive psychology at the Hebrew University of Jerusalem wrote in the Time and Mind journal of philosophy.

“As far Moses on Mount Sinai is concerned, it was either a supernatural cosmic event, which I don’t believe, or a legend, which I don’t believe either, or finally, and this is very probable, an event that joined Moses and the people of Israel under the effect of narcotics,” Shanon told Israeli public radio on Tuesday.

Moses was probably also on drugs when he saw the “burning bush,” suggested Shanon, who said he himself has dabbled with such substances.

“The Bible says people see sounds, and that is a clasic phenomenon,” he said citing the example of religious ceremonies in the Amazon in which drugs are used that induce people to “see music.”

He mentioned his own experience when he used ayahuasca, a powerful psychotropic plant, during a religious ceremony in Brazil’s Amazon forest in 1991. “I experienced visions that had spiritual-religious connotations,” Shanon said.

He said the psychedelic effects of ayahuasca were comparable to those produced by concoctions based on bark of the acacia tree, that is frequently mentioned in the Bible.

Cell Block Party in the Police State

In general, when I go to a party and see a dozen cops, I don’t stay. We call that a Cell Block Party.

Block Party in the Police State by 

rambling man columnIt’s great to live in a community that likes to get together with their friends and neighbors. Block party is a great idea….that’s been ruined by people out to gain political kudos.

As I walked around downtown during the free portion of the event, I couldn’t help noticing there were 12 cops within my view at any time. That’s not counting event security in their yellow shirts.

In general, when I go to a party and see a dozen cops, I don’t stay. This time I did and I was a little disappointed by the booths and vendors. Nothing too special that I noticed. No fantastic treats I was willing to part with $6 for.

I was looking forward to listening to Swamp Mama Johnson at the paid evening show. Those women know how to make people dance, it’s always a great show when Swamp Mama is playing. After going in we were confronted by the same dilemma many people encountered at cell block party; if you wanted a drink you either paid way too much for a Budweiser or Redhook and sat in the beer garden in uncomfortable seats that had no view of the stage…or you could leave…of course then you had to pay another $15 to get back in.

Casa Que Pasa had a tequila bar set up on Cornwall. Just outside the gate. We decided to leave. Travis Holland, the owner of Casa related an interesting story. It seems he went to quite a bit of expense and time to get all the proper licenses and rent a space that was included in Block Party, so why was his establishment just outside the gate? The brown shirt Gestapo organizers decided to move the gate 20 feet in so their Budweiser wouldn’t encounter any competition.

Cell Block Party. To tell you the truth, I thought Block Party stunk. I ended up sitting outside the gate listening to Swamp Mama J, sorta pissed at the fact that I couldn’t get back in. Even Disneyland and The Gorge give you a stamp to go out to the car. I think I had more fun outside than I would’ve inside anyway.

I had a few beers at Father Johns Pub. I used to tend bar there when it was The Station. John has done a remarkable job of giving the place some flavor and class. It was a real scumbag joint when I worked there. I broke up 10 fights in my first week . John runs a much tighter ship.

So anyway, back to block party. It’s nice to see events like that, see everyone out having fun, let the hair down a bit. Too bad the almighty dollar has to become such a factor. Ski to Sea still holds a place in my heart for good free fun. Everyone out giving it their all. Revelers and merrymakers, athletes and bystanders. My favorite part about Ski to Sea is that when you ask anyone “What’s the prize for the winning teams?” Nobody knows…or cares. Ski to Sea is all about the fun, while Cell Block Party is more about gaining prestige for a certain civic group and (to be fair) raising money for a good cause. It’s a neat idea…that I will never attend again. Nice job organizers.

MAIL

Bham man, I was thinking about starting a protest group to protest the bombing of Serbia. Margaret Meade said something like one individual can make a difference and I would like to make that difference because I don’t think we should be bombing people.

Maybe you could help me spread the word and get more people to protest the bombs that we are dropping on Serbia. Maybe you could use your column to tell people about my protest group. Would you like to join it? Thanks, Matt L. Bellingham

Matt,

Margaret Meade lived in a different time when corporations didn’t rule the world. People don’t matter anymore. If we were bombing corporate offices, I’m sure the mega-corps would put a stop to it. What the government is doing is okay though because they’re only killing people. I’d love to help you with this protest group thing but you left out some key info and haven’t answered my e-mails. Where will your group meet? How will you protest? Are you a violent group? Do you have an agenda? C’mon man, you’re playing right into the corporations hands. They would love it if the only protesters are spaced out hippies with no definitive goal. Check out Jim Hightower’s column to find out more about those nasty corporations and get back to me, I probably won’t join, but I’ll help get the word out.