Myself at 45 – Goals Review for 2016

Here I am – I usually do this on my Birthday, but this year – I was away and unable to find the time – so here I go now. At 45, I’m just a few days shy of being exactly 5.5 years shy of my halfway mark through this life. I climbed the Chinese … Continue reading “Myself at 45 – Goals Review for 2016”

Here I am – I usually do this on my Birthday, but this year – I was away and unable to find the time – so here I go now. At 45, I’m just a few days shy of being exactly 5.5 years shy of my halfway mark through this life. I climbed the Chinese mountain that grants you life to 101 years old – so, here I am.

I feel good in my skin. I feel good in my head. I feel good in my spirit. It’s entirely possible that this is the most balanced I have ever been. I did not achieve so many of my 2016 goals – and yet, somehow, I won in this terrible year of nightmares and celebrity deaths.

2016, I dubbed it the “Year of Joy and Gratitude” back in 2015 when I was formulating my plan for the year. My purpose was “Be a better father, friend, son, husband, and brother. Enjoy life more. Make life simpler. Earn more money and use it well.” and the objective was “At the end of 2016 my life will be simpler and I will be focused on family, creativity, garden, health, and joy.” In the years that I’ve been doing this – I’ve found that years rarely comply to the structure I try to set for them. My path to this worthy goal consisted of seven categorized goals with each of them made up of multiple measurable goals. Here they are with analysis for end of year.

1) Keep my family safe, happy and healthy with a combination of healthy food, exercise, games, and providing a safe home. – My focus on getting outside, getting more family time, gardening, reducing meat consumption, and getting my wife her US Citizenship worked. I rocked this goal. On the downside, while I expanded the garden we were assaulted by gophers, slugs, mice and rats, and raccoons who slaughtered our flock of chickens. The garden failed this year despite much more work going into it. Family trips were awesome and getting Hanane her citizenship was the culmination of a huge multi-year effort. A+ on this one despite the garden.
2. Be Fit and Healthy by eating better, exercising more, and meditating. I started the year at a bloated 193 lbs with a 36 inch waist. By summer I had dropped down to 168 and a 32 inch waist but by years end was back at 185 with a 34 inch waist. My failing points were quitting the gym when the school year started (because I could no longer go first thing in the morning) and also never really getting my addiction to sugar under control. I began using the Headspace app to be sure I got my daily dose of meditation and re-awakened my Buddhist practice. The meditation and Buddhism are so incredibly important that I won’t give myself an F in this category but will instead raise it up to a C.
3. Make more money by selling businesses, diversifying, paying off debt. I tried to sell my businesses without success this year. I was unwilling to sell for a loss. I managed to pay off all my credit card debt and improve my credit score but was once again forced to defer my student loans. Financially, I didn’t come anywhere near my goals – and yet, I earned more than the previous year, paid off all my credit cards (but they have crept back up again), and improved my credit score. I also became much better at the business I am in and streamlined my businesses to increase profits and decrease waste. Despite not getting anywhere near my monetary goals – I can’t fail myself here either. I earned a solid C and given the foundation which has been laid, I’m going to bump that up to a C+.
4. Paint, draw, sculpt, build. I didn’t do nearly enough painting, drawing, building, or other artwork – but I did enter three of my paintings in a juried show and managed to sell two of my paintings. B.
5. Lighten load sell and give away stuff. There is so much more work to do here. And yet, I am so much lighter than 2015. I sold, gave away, donated, trashed, and got rid of so much stuff. I changed my buying habits and developed new venues to get rid of my accumulations and earn more money. There is more work here, but I earned a solid A in this goal.
6. Write by writing words. I never knew that writing would become such a difficult thing to do. Creating the time and space for it is the really hard part. I did turn a corner and change from no writing to some writing – but there is a lot of progress to be made here. C.
7. Be joyful with gratitude, acceptance, love. This is a tricky one – I found this, but not in the way I expected. A big part of it was realizing that it’s okay to tell a whole class of people that they suck and I want nothing to do with them. Realizing that was okay and that I don’t have to make room in my life for assholes opened the door to the greatest feeling of acceptance I’ve ever known. My 2015 hippie formula was missing an essential part – it’s okay to turn your back and say fuck that person, they suck and it’s not my problem. A.

Usually there are a whole slew of unplanned goals that I write about here. This year, that didn’t really happen. I did however accomplish some noteworthy things that deserve a bit of extra credit. I taught my 5-year old daughter to read, do math (addition,subtraction, and beginning multiplication) and ride a two wheeled bike. I find myself the proud owner of a 1987 VW Vanagon, once again being a member of the VW tribe. There have been some rather profound personal discoveries which I can’t really describe with words but which come from meditation and self awareness. I’ve got a grasp on the tail-feathers of my inner peace. In a sense, I feel like I’ve been Steve Martin in that movie The Jerk and I’ve been clutching onto that chair and thermos whilst ignoring the seemingly simple wisdom of my share-cropping father who tried to point out the difference between shit and shinola. At some point in 2016, I dropped the chair and thermos and stopped rubbing shit in my hair. I get it papa. And that earns me an extra credit A+.

By my reckoning, that gives me a cumulative GPA of 3.31 which translates (by rounding up to a 3.5 or a B+ for 2016. That sounds about right.

Author: Administrator

A very lucky primate who lives without a permanent home or destination. Wandering the world and enjoying this existensis.

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